My May Resolution: DON’T THINK TOO MUCH. Relax. Enjoy Life. Give yourself at least another 17 days to unwind before you try to figure it all out.
There’s only one problem.
PEOPLE KEEP ASKING ME WHAT I’M GOING TO DO NEXT.
Please, I beg of you. Stop asking me. I can’t take it. I try to answer, but then I get stressed out that I don’t know the answer. But when you ask me, YOU MAKE ME THINK.
SO, To facilitate the elimination of this conversation from my life (for at least another 17 days), I am providing answers to those frequently asked below.
Q: What are you going to do now that you have a master’s degree?
A: My job.
Q: But you have all this extra time now? How will you fill it?
A: My job. Oh, and hiking a LOT MORE.
Q: Will you get a big raise?
Q: Not anything at all?
A: No, really. No raise.
Q: But what about that non-profit cooking class for women on food stamps you want to start?
A: Yes, that’s there in the back of my mind. Ask me about it in June. or maybe July.
Q: Won’t you be bored?
Q: You could go anywhere now, couldn’t you?
A: Yes. Please, PLEASE, PUH-LEEEEZE shut up.
Let me make it clear that I love you all for caring. For your support and excitement about this accomplishment. But my resolution is to relax, remember? This is NOT HELPING.
To make this easier, here is a recommended set of ALTERNATIVE questions I encourage you to ask me as well as the answers you can expect from me.
Q: Want to go on a hike?
A: Yes, I’ll meet you in 10 minutes.
Q: Can I come for a visit?
A: I’d love that! As long as we don’t talk about what I’m going to do next!
Q: What are you having for dinner?
A: Something awesome, want to join me?
Q: Want to go out for a drink?
Q: Want to walk your dog?
Q: Want to help me paint/clean/shop/cook/take care of kids?
A: Sign me up!
Q: Where is the beer?
A: In the basement.
Thank you for your cooperation.